Green Hornet

I remember back in the day when I used to watch Batman with Adam West and Burt Ward. If I switched on the TV too early or too late, The Green Hornet would be on. It didn't have the same draw for me as Batman did. I found that the characters were more serious, compared to the Dynamic Duo, who had their campy moments. I was too young to even know who Bruce Lee was, but sometimes I would tune in just to pass the time.

When I saw the trailer for this year's Green Hornet, I wasn't very impressed. It's a bad habit of mine, judging movies by their trailers. I've been proven wrong numerous times, namely by Pixar movies. While this wasn't a Pixar movie, when my friends scheduled it for our regular Saturday night outing, I shrugged and thought, "Well, why not?"

I ask myself again: Well, why not?

Because I could have saved my forehead from all the facepalming I did for the movie's first 50 minutes. No wait, let me rephrase that, since I'm not sure how long the movie's running time was. So, yes, I kept slapping myself on the noggin' except during the last 10-15 minutes. I rolled my eyes when I saw that Seth Rogen, the actor that played the Green Hornet, was also part of the screenwriting team. And I raised my eyes to the heavens, wondering how the original 70s Green Hornet, Van Williams, saw this new movie. I'm just glad Jay Chou was adequate as Kato. Pretty big shoes to fill after all.

The Green Hornet was such a departure from the character of my childhood. Why did they write him like such a spoiled, insensitive, mindless, stupid brat? Was he supposed to be fun? He didn't seem fun. Maybe they did it so he wouldn't end up as boring. Couldn't there have been something "more exciting", a, I don't know, drastic plot twist or something that suddenly reveals him to be more hero than bumbling sidekick-feeling-hero? Really. It feels like Seth Rogen's vigilante was an Igor trying to don Dr. Frankenstein's lab coat! I can't even compare him to Robin or any of the other sidekicks. He is definitely NOT in Bats' league! Bruce would so kick his immature ass.

I don't know. I didn't find anything redeemable about him at all. It's like they used Kato to redeem him. But then, the movie should have been titled KATO instead of GREEN HORNET.

I guess my opinion is rather shallow. But I have all the slapmarks on my forehead to show my agitation. It's not my fault I like my superheroes just the way they are: WITH A BRAIN.

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